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To Love and Be Loved

Posted On 09/24/2012
Q:

What are love languages, and how can they help caring for my family?

A:

A song written in 1947 titled “Nature Boy” sings, “The greatest thing you’ll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return”. Love is the subject of millions of songs, stories, artworks and poems. Love is as essential as food and water! It’s true - infants and toddlers that are starved of love and attention often have disabilities for their entire lives, such as extremely low learning capacity, poor retention of information and lack of proper social conduct. As teenagers and adults, a lack of love (through family, friends or romantic relationships) leads to loneliness, depression, lack of drive and ultimately a shorter life span.

The first time each of us experience love is through our bond with our parents. How exciting it is to be the first love of your child’s life once you become a parent too! As we grow, each of us develops what is called a “Love Language”, or a way of expressing and perceiving love. According to esteemed author Gary Chapman, there are five Love Languages and each of us have at least one or two through which the feeling of love is experienced. These languages are: Words of Affirmation, Quality Time, Receiving Gifts, Acts of Service and Physical Touch.

For instance, if your Love Language as a teenager is Quality Time, you will experience the warmth of love when someone sets aside special time just for you. You would express love by doing the same for your loved one. But if your mother’s Love Language is Acts of Service, she will experience the feeling of love through service, such as if someone made a special dessert for her. She might express love by cleaning your bedroom while you’re at school. Both of these things are great, but since you both “speak” different Love Languages you may not always understand what the other person is “saying” to you.

If you know your own love language as well as the languages of your loved ones, then you will understand the most effective way to communicate your love by trying to speak their “Language”. So how do you find out what Love Language you “speak”? And how do you find out what Love Language your loved ones are “speaking”? Visit www.5lovelanguages.com/assessments/love/ and you will find a number of tests for you, your spouse and your children (young or old)! These multiple choice quizzes only take 2-3 minutes to complete and the results can change your family for a lifetime.

Once you understand a tailored way to communicate love to each individual family member, you may be shocked at how much your relationships blossom and strengthen with one another. Find out what Love Language you’re speaking today!

 
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